BURN THE TAPE: Mighty Ducks Episode 5
Happy 5th birthday to Emilio Estevez
It’s Sunday, you know what that means! New edition of Burn The Tape. You may be thinking, “Ramz, your sister’s ex-boyfriend STILL hasn’t noticed you’re using his Disney Plus account?” and to that I say, “No, he has not, thank you for asking.”
Let’s do a quick recap of everything so far:
The Ducks are rude, Evan and his mom Alex started a team of “Don’t Bothers”, I think Alex and Emilio Estevez are gonna fuck, the Don’t Bothers suck ass but scored their first goal, they got another good player named Sofi, and this show definitely has racist undertones.
Episode 5: Cherry Picker
Omg, I think Emilio Estevez just asked Alex out on a date? I KNEW they were going to fuck. He’s asking her to a Wild game, probably to go watch Kirill Kaprizov, honestly same. I think Alex was about to say yes but Evan’s dad just walked into the rink? Where has he been this whole time?
Oh, I guess he’s a musician who’s on the road all the time. Alright, that makes sense. I was about to ask why Evan was so pumped to see him when he’s never around but I’d be pretty excited to see my musician dad after he’s just been on a tour. Come on Baba, it’s not too late.
Oh god, I hate when shows do this. His dad is like, “Wow so you just started this whole team for him?” and Alex goes, “Yeah it was a bit of a spur of the moment decision. We know something about that.” (Because they never really dated and I guess just had sex and got pregnant). And the dad goes, “Hah, yes we do.” You guys fucked like 13 years ago, totally normal and not weird to bring it up now, in front of Emilio Estevez nonetheless. It’s like when shows try to do that whole “I’m going to call my brother ‘bro’ and explain our entire family back story randomly at breakfast one day just so the audience knows what’s going on.” I hate it, it’s very obvious and unnatural and nobody speaks like that.
Lol, the dad is leaving and is like, “I gotta jump, soundcheck” and looks down at his wrist but his watch wasn’t showing due to his sleeve. Why couldn’t they just refilm that?
Ok, this show is funny but not intentionally. They’re trying so hard to make these 12-year old girls have problems that just like, don’t exist. Like one girl is victimizing herself because she’s from New York.
Emilio Estevez and Evan’s dad (his name is Rob) are bonding over their tour life and travelling.
Rob told Evan he’d be at his game on Thursday, now he’s with Emilio Estevez before the game and he said his manager just got them a gig if they could be there by 9. Wow, shocker, the dad who’s practically non-existent can’t make it to the kid’s sports game he said he would be at? I’ve never seen this trope in a show or movie before. Who could have seen this coming?
Emilio Estevez says he’ll take him to the airport instead of Rob taking an Uber, but Emilio essentially kidnaps him and instead of taking him to the airport, takes him to the game. Honestly, power move. Rob keeps trying to leave throughout the game and Emilio won’t let him. Evan plays the best game of his life because his dad showed up. Also, his number is “11” and the dad yells, “let’s go one-one” lol. They were down 4-1 with like 4 minutes left of the game but they tied it. They make it 5-4 at the buzzer and win, even though Evan scored all five goals, it was still a team effort I guess. That was their first win! I think people are crying?
Alex finds out that Emilio kidnapped Rob to bring him to the game. Alex is obviously turned on hearing that. She goes to tell Emilio that she’ll go with him to the Wild game, but he says he was thinking of taking Evan to celebrate the win if she’s alright with it. Wow, father figure alert!
I swear to god if this show makes me wait until the last episode to see Alex and Emilio fuck, I’ll be so pissed.
The episode ends with one guy who plays for the Ducks telling Evan that his asshole coach was at the Don’t Bothers game last night and wants to talk to Evan about the Ducks. Conflict!
Recap/thoughts
I actually liked this episode! There was a good amount of conflict without going overboard to the point it was unrealistic. We saw more of Emilio’s fatherly side, and there were no racist undertones in this episode. My bar is quite low. Actually wait, the last episode was all about Sofi joining the team (a brown girl) because she would be their best player and we practically saw nothing of her in this episode and now all of a sudden the white dude scores 5 goals? Whatever, Mighty Ducks.
The only thing I’m really looking forward to at this point is Alex and Emilio fucking. But I think they’re going to tease me some more with that and make me wait a few more episodes.
Previous Episodes: