Scorchstack Issue #65- Drunk Europeans and Refs Dressed Like Cows
The Turner Elson tribute Scorchstack. This will not be mentioned again
Nikita Zadorov makes me pray for the return of the Michael Stone-Erik Gudbranson pairing. I never thought I would have to type these words.
What’s inside?
Jim Benning is no longer an NHL GM. We are very sad.
Prospects: do we really care about them? Well, we do care about some, specifically these ones.
Holiday season? You fool, it’s actually Spengler Cup season.
Since last issue
Scorchstack Issue #64 was released, a jumbo sized newsletter filled with bad t-shirts, funny pranks, one real history lesson, and one questionably real history lesson.
Big Monday Thing! Oh you didn’t read Big Monday Thing? I’m getting sick looking at you right now.
Matthew Tkachuk scored a goal using Drew Doughty as a screen. Lol. Don’t ask me about the rest of the road trip.
Ashes to Ashes, Picks That Are Busts
Is this a eulogy? Who knows. God I miss you already, Jim.
by Mike (@MikeFAIL)
There are few Canadians who have entered existence and left an indelible mark on history in their respected fields. Andrew Mangiapane was born in an Olive Garden in the Greater-Toronto area some years ago and he has risen to become the world’s greatest goal scorer who is on the cusp of being named to Team Canada. Jarome Arthur-Leigh Adekunle Tig Junior Elvis Iginla (it’s legally mandated by Scorchstack Leadership we say his entire name) escaped his mother’s womb in Edmonton to become his era’s greatest power forward matching his goal scoring prowess with his ability to bloody men in his wake. Now he’s enshrined in the Hockey Hall of Fame.
Then there is Jim Benning.
James Elmer Benning is the result of a Hockey Men breeding program launched in the late 50’s which culminated with his arrival in April of 1963. The goal was very simple on paper, but extremely ahead of it’s time for the era: produce a man who will play in the NHL, rise through the ranks of NHL clubs learning as much as possible, and then take over a team driving it into utter ruin. If the scientists who helped enable Jim’s existence where still alive today they would be proud of their work.
Jim’s education wasn’t in a classroom, but in a board room with various hockey men past and present. Rather than master math or basic finance, he studied heart and sandpaper. When it came to identifying business practices that could help him later in his career, he studied redundancy by prophesizing that could have a Brandon Sutter and Jay Beagle decades prior to their conception. Due to the Hockey Man breeding program, Benning’s skull was three inches thicker than the average human. This added layer of protection from blows to the head also hindered his ability to absorb and understand logical decision making. Inevitably this led to him becoming the apex predator of hockey men who could take down a club in a matter of years.
He leaves behind a legendary run which in many respects is dynastic. No general manager in this era could string together so many seasons of inconsistent results, draft picks that became busts, false-starts, and failed promises than Jim’s run in Vancouver. In many regards he’s the second coming of Mike Milbury, only beneath his hockey man frame is a heart of good intentions which is more than you could ever say about Milbury.
The league without Jim running a team, at least for now, is a significantly sadder world. No Jim means Canucks fans have very little to complain about; fans in other markets have no one to point at and say “well, at least we’re not Vancouver”; and the end of potentially new Jim memes is heartbreaking. God I miss him so much already. Now, I mourn his departure as Canucks fans celebrate a single win under Bruce Boudreau and an interim-front office hoping to salvage whatever the fuck the Canucks are this year.
What can you say to a man who has been so consistent in delivering the absolutely best content, as a fan of a team who relishes every moment of Vancouver suffering?
Thank you, Jim, for everything you’ve done and accomplished. I’ve turned to Catholicism and will now pray for your return to a hockey team’s front office in the future.
The Semi-Annual Return of the Prospect Give A Shit Meter
Don’t ask me when the next one is coming out, I don’t know either.
by tibs (@decayinwtheboys)
Looks like it’s time to bring back the semi annual give a shit meter for prospects!
Preamble: Let’s compare hockey to Star Wars for just a second. The only movies you need to watch from the Star Wars saga are Star Wars 4, 5, and 6. They’re fantastic and truthfully, the only important part of the entire Star Wars story. NHL hockey is Star Wars 4, 5, and 6: they’re the best, and everything else is just a shallow, not even half as good imitation of that.
Following that thread, Star Wars 1, 2, and 3 is prospect hockey. Yes, those movies do resemble 4, 5, and 6 just as prospect hockey does resemble NHL hockey. And yes, there are interesting moments in the prequels/minor league hockey, but they don’t really matter in the grand scheme of things. Anything that happens in those worlds are only loosely related to what happens in the main one.
If you are a normal person, you simply don’t have to give a shit about them, the Star Wars prequels or prospect hockey. You can just watch the good version of the bad thing, no need to waste your time on the bad thing. But there are sickos (me) who do actually enjoy those things, and boy we can’t help but fill you in on the details of all the stuff you don’t really need to know to enjoy what you’re watching, but is still tangentially related to it.
In the interest of everyone’s time, here’s a brief look at the Flames prospects, sorted by how much you actually need to care about them. If you don’t like it, get mad at Nathan who gave me the idea. It’s his fault.
Give a shit tier: You should give a shit about these players. This is very straightforward.
Matthew Coronato, RW- Harvard, NCAA (11 GP: 6G-6A)
I’ll admit to being a Coronato skeptic when he was drafted. Maybe it’s just lingering hurt from some other Long Island kid who went to Harvard and then fucked off when he could, but there were also hockey reasons. He did score nearly a goal per game over the stretch of a 52 game season in the USHL, but he played on a pretty unique Chicago Steel team that plays hockey like no one else does. Perhaps I was galaxy braining it, but I felt that a kid that was not on many radars prior to the draft playing on a team that is out of step with the rest of the hockey world might be in for a rude awakening when he joined up with said rest of the hockey world.
So far, he hasn’t raised any doubts or red flags. He’s still driving the offence and looks just as legit. A+
Jakob Pelletier, LW - Stockton Heat (18 GP: 7G-11A)
There are so-called prospect knowers and hockey geniuses who say ridiculous things like “Jakob Pelletier doesn’t need to be rushed, let him marinate in the AHL.” They are fools who are telling you with a straight face that it is better for Pelletier to dummy a bunch of AHLers for fifty more games than it is for him to replace Tyler Pitlick or Trevor Lewis in the lineup. You do not need to listen to them.
Jeremy Poirier, D - Saint John Sea Dogs (26 GP: 7G-20A)
Like freewheeling left handed defencemen who skate like the breeze? Well, have all the freewheeling left handed defencemen who skate like the breeze you’d like! (Simpsons reference)
Seriously though, he’s good. It’s a shame he can’t play in the AHL this season because I think he has to start feeling bored playing a third of every Saint John game and just dominating the opposition. 288 forwards have suited up for a QMJHL game this season and Poirier is outscoring 258 of them.
Adam Ruzicka, C - Calgary Flames/Stockton Heat (2 GP: 1G-0A/ 13GP: 10G-6A)
Isn’t it just wonderful when one of our own grows up and hits the big leagues? Look, he’s already scored a goal!
To be a downer, hockey brain will reign supreme and Ruzicka will be pushed out of the lineup when Tyler Pitlick is healthy again. This is a shame, because he’s seemed to finally sort out some of the consistency issues that have been a drag on his whole career.
Dustin Wolf, G - Stockton Heat (12 GP: 0.937SV%)
To continue that Star Wars metaphor, prospect goaltender analysis is the extended universe books (books! you don’t even get to see the cool explosions!) about a Wookie who knew an unnamed character who was lurking in the background for half a second in one movie. Yes they exist.
All well and good if you like that stuff, but you’re missing the forest for the trees. Yeah I suppose that there could be something interesting about a bounty hunter or something who lives in Hoth, but who really cares if it doesn’t answer any of the questions brought up by the main plot of Star Wars. To bring it back to hockey, yeah I suppose that there could be something interesting about actual goaltender mechanics and lateral movement or whatever, but who really cares if it doesn’t answer the basic question of “does he stop pucks?”
For Dustin Wolf, who has spent his career stopping a lot of pucks, I can confirm that he continues to stop a lot of pucks. Who cares how he does it or if he’s tall enough, he stops pucks. He stopped pucks in junior, now he’s stopping pucks in the pros. The last place left for him to stop pucks is the NHL. You really don’t need to overthink this, unlike literally the entire NHL that almost let him get away undrafted.
Give a shit, but cool your jets tier: These aren’t really ranked tiers, but this one is. It ranks one below the one above. Basically, you should care about these prospects, but there’s probably some unrealistic expectations bouncing around in your head.
Ryan Francis, RW - Saint John Sea Dogs, QMJHL (14 GP: 6G-9A)
Francis blew the hell up last season after a midseason trade from Cape Breton to Saint John, and excited Flames fans. We finally started appreciating Andrew Mangiapane, small late round draft pick, and there was another small late round draft pick in the system? Holy moly.
Then he hit the AHL, didn’t do much, and has since gone back and underwhelmed in Saint John. Ah well.
Maybe we all jumped the gun on this one. The talent didn’t disappear overnight, so perhaps he’s still getting in the swing of things after starting on one coast and moving all the way to the other one, but you do have to be wary that he might’ve gone hot for one season.
Emil Heineman, LW/RW - Leksands IF, SHL (25 GP: 8G-3A)
One of my gauges for how well European prospects are doing is seeing how much Europeans are freaking out about them. Let’s take a look at how Swedes are reacting to Emil Heineman:
Poor translation: Just to enjoy Emil heineman games right now, next year he may be lost to the NHL
Bold!
Poor translation: Washington Capitals traded Filip Forsberg to Nashville. The Florida Panthers traded Emil Heineman to Calgary. Good scouting and drafting is no guarantee of good decisions in the future. Florida should repent. Heineman is roasting and developing something enormous.
Extremely bold! I hope Heineman roasts and develops something enormous over here too.
Poor translation: The Värmland woman thought that there was a lot of talk about Emil Heineman. Personally, I think you can not talk enough about Emil Heineman. But also wants to emphasize the class hill Calle Själin. Like Carter Camper who makes everything look so playfully simple
Boy those Värmland women probably feel foolish now! I don’t know what a class hill is though.
So the Swedes love him, and beloved Swedes eventually make beloved Flames. I personally believe that someone who is playing third line minutes in the SHL probably isn’t going to make an immediate impact in the SHL, but he is fourth in U21 scoring in a men’s league. There’s something there.
Rory Kerins, C - Soo Greyhounds, OHL (23 GP: 13G-26A)
When he was drafted, Kerins wasn’t much of a notable hockey prospect. He carried the load for a pretty bad Soo team and then acted as a practice body for the Stockton Heat last year.
A third through the current OHL season, and he looks actually legit. The negative side of my brain keeps waiting for an extended scoring drought because he can’t possibly be this good but he keeps ripping off multi-point games. As much as you would like to write it off as a 20 year old playing in a junior league, you can’t ignore a top five finish in OHL scoring, especially given the level of talent. I remain skeptical given that there are very few late round junior players who make and sustain such a dramatic jump (the aforementioned Ruzicka was held in higher regard and never put up production like this), but if he keeps it up it could be another Flames draft steal.
Wait a few years tier: [Morrissey voice] These things take time.
Jake Boltmann, D - Notre Dame Fighting Irish, NCAA (15 GP: 1G-7A)
Folks, can you say Scorchstack had it first?
Scorchstack had it first.
After coming off a severely underwhelming season where he scored literally zero points, Boltmann began this season as an extra defender and has since worked his way up to actually looking like he’s worth a damn. He sits third on ND for defenceman scoring, and is rocking a pretty nice +14.39 5v5 GFrel%.
But of course, development is not linear and we should never take the first sign of progress as indication that he’s destined for great things. Especially when someone who was never really known for his offence suddenly finds that gear, or when a former write-off suddenly emerges after a half a season. Boltmann still has two more years of college (plus minors) to prove us wrong or right, so we’ll wait to see if that other shoe drops.
Yan Kuznetsov, D - Saint John Sea Dogs, QMJHL (0 GP)
“Wait a few years” may apply to the Flames and not the fan in this situation, as they were apparently so gung-ho on signing Kuznetsov right out of college only to stash him somewhere else after he false-started in the AHL this season. I really do think the Flames made a backroom deal with Saint John to take his rights in the import draft, there’s no other explanation.
Arsenii Sergeev- Tri City Storm, USHL (14 GP: 0.937 SV%)
Like with Wolf above, Sergeev stops a lot of pucks. That’s good!
But he’s still early in his career that the Peter Principle of business management still applies: he’s only a good goaltender until he reaches a level where he’s suddenly not that. I’m not here to say that stopping so many pucks that there is a 0.024SV% gap between Sergeev and the second best USHL goaltender is actually a bad thing, but doing that in the USHL is not something to get too excited about. Let’s see him do it in the NCAA first, and then the AHL, and then the NHL.
William Stromgren, LW - Rogle, Sweden U20 (26 GP: 8G-14A)
Considered one of the most skilled but not fully put together prospects at the draft, Stromgren has been lagging behind expectations of a second round pick by not quite convincingly dominating overseas. He’s still putting up numbers, and has earned a very brief SHL call-up, but he doesn’t leap off the page just yet. Maybe a World Juniors appearance might really boost his profile, but there’s just nothing to get excited about quite yet.
Connor Zary, C/LW - Stockton Heat (10 GP: 3G-0A)
We all had dreams that he would immediately carry on from his productive WHL career and eye popping AHL cup of coffee and inject young blood into a Flames team that can’t stop signing 35 year olds.
Then he went and got his foot broke in a rookie game blocking a shot and now we have to start from scratch. Zary didn’t get a training camp, was added to a roster that was already gelling at a position that he doesn’t really play, and it shows in his early season results. We might have to wait a while on this one.
Underdog tier: Guys with outside shots that are just young enough and talented enough to pay attention to, with the caveat that it’s probably not going to work out.
Ilya Nikolayev, C - Tri City Storm, USHL (16 GP: 5G-11A)
Remember this guy? Second round pick two years ago? After struggling in the Russian minor leagues for the past two seasons and briefly being exiled to Belarus, he has emerged in the USHL of all places to prove that he’s actually that two-way centre the Flames thought they were drafting.
Hats off to him, he’s doing a pretty good job so far and has become a minute-munching defensive centre with some offensive upside even with only a brief acclimitization period. The right thing to ask is whether we should expect more out of a 20 year old in a junior league, but all the complicating factors and speedbumps he’s hit also allow you to cut him some slack. Nikolayev is a fine player, but doesn’t yet seem like the one you hand a contract to.
Josh Nodler, C - Michigan State Spartans, NCAA (16 GP: 4G-7A)
I’ve used the phrase “Jack of all trades, master of none” to describe Nodler before. It still applies this season, where he is the beating heart of the Spartans and has extended his tremendous two-way play for another season.
Unfortunately, he doesn’t do any of those things at an NHL level, and probably never will. He might play a clean, responsible game and be an easy guy to root for, but he just might not be good enough to really make a dent at the NHL level. Here’s to hoping though.
Martin Pospisil, LW/C - Stockton Heat (12 GP: 4G-4A)
Think: a poor man’s Matthew Tkachuk, with more aggression and less cheeky penalty drawing tactics.
Pospisil is a lot of fun to watch because he has a hair-trigger (to be fair, he has worked on it: he is no longer trying to fight fans) and some offensive skills that make him a legit NHL prospect instead of just some goon. He can make a game lively by himself, and actually had a pretty good preseason showing for whatever that’s worth.
Unfortunately, what makes him fun is largely what will drive coaches bonkers. He’s not entirely disciplined, and any youngster has to not fuck up at all to even earn a regular shift. That’s a tall hurdle to clear when that’s also your calling card.
Also has a poor track record of staying healthy.
Dmitry Zavgorodniy, RW - Stockton Heat/HK Sochi, KHL (6 GP: 0G-0A/0 GP)
It hurts me to put him here, but after nearly going an entire season without scoring last year and being loaned to Russia, it does seem like little Zavgorodniy might be on the outs. He’s succeeded everywhere but the AHL, so it really only feels like a matter of time and opportunity before he finally pops. He might get that in Sochi, and hopefully it convinces the Flames to actually do something with one of their exciting small players.
????????????? tier: This is the tier of players who we don’t know enough about yet, but at least have some level of intrigue around them to pay some attention.
Jack Beck, RW - Ottawa 67’s, OHL (12 GP: 11G-6A)
The Flames took a flyer on Beck in the sixth round of the most recent draft, which was mostly gut-based as he did not play hockey in 2020-21 and 16 year old seasons aren’t rich material to analyze. So far it’s paid off, as Beck has jumped off the page to begin the OHL season by potting just under a goal per game.
Then he got injured, so all we really have to look at is a 12 game heater where he was shooting 30%. Not to dismiss the kid completely because he’s riding the percentages, but we still don’t have enough to say what he is or what he could be. Hopefully he comes back like nothing ever happened!
Daniil Chechelev, G - Kansas City Mavericks (5 GP: 0.909 SV%)
The unfortunate third man out in Stockton, Chechelev has at least established himself as the best goaltender on the Flames’ ECHL affiliate. Unfortunately it is the ECHL, so who really cares, but at least he’s getting some playing time.
Cole Jordan, D - Moose Jaw Warriors, WHL (2 GP: 0G-0A)
A favourite of scouts for his smooth skating, Jordan contracted an illness two games into the season and has not played since. A little ominious.
Johannes Kinvall, D - Calgary Flames, technically (0 GP)
His knee exploded, which kind of poured a bunch of water on his entire future. We thought we finally got that elusive mobile RHD prospect who could put up a bunch of points and no one’s heard from him in a long time. Rest up, bud.
No strong opinions tier: Sometimes you don’t have to have opinions on anything. That’s fine too.
Cole Huckins, C - Acadie Bathurst Titan, QMJHL (22 GP: 10G-10A)
Someone in the Scorchstack group chat said he had an I Think You Should Leave name and that’s the only thing I think about him.
Ilya Solovyov, D - Stockton Heat (10 GP: 0G-1A)
A seventh round flyer who made the trip overseas to take a crack at an NHL career. Hasn’t gone well so far, but hasn’t gone poorly.
Cameron Whynot, D - Halifax Mooseheads, QMJHL (23 GP: 2G-10A)
Seems alright. With a player like him, you have to say “Hey………….
……………
…………
…………
…………..
…………..
……………
………….
………..
why not?”
The danger zone: A new tier I just invented, one for prospects with the lights fading on their NHL hopes. Your investment in them is at your own risk.
Glenn Gawdin, C - Stockton Heat (16 GP: 8G-12A)
Technically, he did make the Flames this season, but only technically. They immediately sent him down when Tyler Pitlick and Brad Richardson became healthy, and then called up a different guy when one of them got hurt again. A shame, since he has been majorly productive, but it doesn’t look like the Flames see an NHLer in him. Guess he’ll have to wait for his next opportunity to prove it, but who knows when that will come.
Mathias Emilio Pettersen, LW/RW- Stockton Heat (15 GP: 0G-4A)
MEP is here to score goals, because he can’t do much else. He is not scoring goals. The Flames have a whole lot of winger depth. This does not bode well for him.
Matthew Phillips, RW - Stockton Heat (15 GP: 7G-9A)
This absolutely sucks to put him here. I don’t want to put him here. I hate that I invented a new tier.
But it’s unfortunately true. Phillips absolutely deserved a look on a club with perpetual depth scoring issues outside of one phony make-up game with the Canucks last season, and maybe he could’ve done something with it. Or maybe he couldn’t have, but at least we would know for certain instead of wonder what could’ve been.
That intrigue is fading though, as he’s already seem to have settled into “is what he is” territory on the Heat. Guys like Gawdin, Pelletier, and Ruzicka have seen their numbers go up into that upper echelon where you can convincingly say they should play in the NHL regularly. Phillips is lagging behind a bit, projected to put up only slightly better than what he did in year previous. With four years under his belt, small gains every year don’t inspire confidence in your long term NHL future (please go on a heater).
Do not care tier: You do not need to care about these prospects
Lucas Ciona, LW - Seattle Thunderbirds, WHL (20 GP: 3G-7A)
Harsh thing to say about a recent draftee? Yes, but he’s a big, low-scoring, high-violence WHLer. We’ve seen this story about a million times and we know the ending.
Walker Duehr, RW - Stockton Heat (9 GP: 2G-2A)
Duehr is a Sutter Guy which gives him a leg up on anyone else in this tier, but we should remember that his career will likely be “younger Trevor Lewis,” if he manages to beat out some of the more skilled prospects. The high point of guys like these is Garnet Hathaway, where you make decent money holding down some other team’s fourth line after the most recent college UFA signing takes your place.
Lucas Feuk, LW - Nybro Vikings IF/Vasby IK, Hockeyettan (5 GP: 0G-2A/1 GP: 0G-1A)
I did not know there was a third tier of Swedish hockey until Lucas Feuk was sent there. He was sent there because they couldn’t put him in the U20 leagues anymore.
Justin Kirkland, LW - Stockton Heat (17 GP: 3G-3A)
Did you know that this guy is still technically eligible to win the Calder.
Demetrios Koumontzis, LW/C - Arizona State, NCAA (15 GP: 4G-4A)
I’m not a hockey expert or anything, but is it bad if you scored 20 points in 35 games as a freshman and then take 52 games over the next three years to score your next 20? Injuries and COVID certainly played heavily into that, but he’s gone backwards every single season and the starting point was only mildly intriguing to begin with.
Connor Mackey, D - Stockton Heat (18 GP: 3G-8A)
Mackey’s in with the main club was that he could theoretically win a spot (even as a 7D) if Oliver Kylington was once again on the outs. Now Kylington is a top four D, and even with Juuso Valimaki’s recent demotion (you might want to read deeply into Mackey only starting to make a major impact on the Heat this season after Valimaki was added), there’s still not a whole lot of room for a 25 year old defenceman whose skill set is lower ceiling than two younger LHD (arguably three if you want to include Poirier in this discussion). Could he play the right side? Maybe, but I figure that if you can’t clear the bar of Michael Stone and Erik Gudbranson, your team doesn’t think highly of your talent.
Mitchell Mattson, LW- Michigan State, NCAA (9 GP: 1G-1A)
He was part of the same draft class as Matthew Tkachuk and Dillon Dube and is struggling for ice time at a pretty middling NCAA program.
Tyler Parsons, G - technically the Calgary Flames, but really nowhere (0 GP)
If my NHL dreams were fading but the organization kept giving me another chance, I would simply put aside my personal beliefs and get vaccinated so I could at least have a job with a salary. That’s just me though.
Luke Philp, C - Stockton Heat (18 GP: 6G-6A)
Another 25 year old ex-university player with some skills, but not NHL level ones. Only intriguing because he played Canadian college hockey instead of American.
Colton Poolman, D - Stockton Heat (15 GP: 0G-3A)
Stockton’s 5v5 GF% is 58.46%. Colton Poolman’s is 42.86%. Pretty good.
Eetu Tuulola, RW - Stockton Heat (13 GP: 3G-1A)
I love, love, love Eetu Tuulola but it’s just not working out. I knew deep down he wasn’t going to be punching faces and tapping-in Matthew Tkachuk setups, but it was a fun thing to imagine in 2016.
Adam Werner, G - Stockton Heat (6 GP: .882 SV%)
It’s a bit rough that he keeps getting the second half of Heat back-to-backs, but when you’re older than Dan Vladar and Dustin Wolf while also being much worse than them, you should probably start looking for opportunities somewhere else.
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Scorchstack is back on top of the charts for this year’s Spotify Wrapped. As it should be. Next year we release our first full-length album.
Let's Get Some Former Calgary Flames In The Spengler Cup
Someone around here must have some kind of authority to get this done
by Floob (@itlooksreal)
We’ve talked about this before, but it bears repeating: The Spengler Cup is the best sports tournament in the world. You dump an arena at the base of a literal Swiss Alp and pack it with a bunch of drunk Europeans and refs dressed like cows over the Christmas break and just go wild with an invitational club hockey tourney that also includes a national team from Canada for reasons no one has ever explained. It’s so fucking tight.
It’s also the most “Remember A Guy” week on the hockey calendar, as the Spengler is home to every third and fourth line NHL player from 2006, the ones you always wondered “what happened to Adam Tambellini?” Well, I’ll tell you what happened. He’s playing in the Spengler Cup.
Naturally, the Calgary Flames were replete with third and fourth liners in 2006, so there are plenty of alumni to showcase their wares in Davos, Switzerland, and I think, given the exhibition takes place in a mere two and a half weeks, that it would be fun to check in on some of these guys and figure out if they might take some laps at Vaillant Arena.
I’ll look into potential candidates for the tournament that happen to be ex-Calgary Flames, and I’ll categorize them into “Should Be There” guys, “Interesting Outsiders” and “Long Shots”. Read on for a bonus fourth category!
1. Former Flames already expected to be there (The bonus fourth category)
If you are unfamiliar with the format of the Spengler Cup, it’s an invitational tournament from some of the top club squads in Europe, with 4 teams being asked to compete every year alongside the perpetual host team, HC Davos, and inexplicably, Team Canada. One of the teams who will be competing this year is HC Sparta Praha, Prague’s entry from the Czech Extraliga. Sparta currently boasts both Roman Horak and Daniel Prybil. Horak, you may remember, was the throwaway player the New York Rangers included in the Tim Erixon trade, who nonetheless managed to suit up for 82 games over three seasons for the Flames. Daniel Prybil is famous for being the guy that wasn’t Roman Cervenka.
None of the other club teams have former Flames on them, so anyone else still hoping to appear in the Spengler need to be selected to Team Canada, a club assembled from Canadian talent playing across Europe, and occasionally, the AHL. Hockey Canada has named a coaching and managerial staff, but as of this writing, the roster is not set. With that in mind, let’s focus on a Flames filled Canadian squad.
2. Should Be On The Team
None.
3. Interesting Outsiders
Nigel Dawes - Dawes, now 36 years old, is still a point per game player in the Deutsche Eishockey Liga with Adler Mannheim. Despite being a mainstay and a very productive player in Europe since he left the NHL in 2011, he’s never played in the Spengler Cup. I don’t know how many chances he has left, and it would be cool of Hockey Canada to invite him while they still can. Not like he’d be a liability anyway.
Brett Carson - The best #3 in Flames history, Carson recently joined Lausitzer Fuche of the DEL to play against Nigel Dawes. Carson has bounced around Europe, with stops in the SHL in Sweden, the Liiga in Finland, and an Austrian league with a name so ridiculous I refuse to write it out. He’s been…okay in Europe, which is the defining characteristic of a Spengler Cup participant.
Brendan Mikkelson - Mikkelson currently plays for the Cardiff Devils in England, so I don’t know why I thought he might be a hopeful for Team Canada. My apologies.
Lance Bouma - Oh shit, oh shit, it’s Lance Bouma. After getting the Backlund Bump in Calgary, but flaming out of the league (sorry for the pun) after departing Calgary, Bouma moved to Sweden to try and find those kind of linemates full time. Currently plying his trade with the Malmo RedHawks, Bouma is just about matching the level of production Backlund gifted to Bouma that earned him a contract he certainly wasn’t ready to live up to. Maybe Canada asks what’s up. Probably not.
Leland Irving - One time the Flames let Irving get shelled for 9 goals against the Boston Bruins and almost every part of him died. The rest of him moved to Europe. Irving has journeyed to every corner in hockey’s east, and has even seen ice time in the Spengler Cup before as the puckstopper for the 2014 runners up HC Salavat Yulaef Ufa. Irving plays in Switzerland now already, so presumably he already trains inside of a mountain in preparation.
Ben Street - This is Street’s first season in Germany, signing on with EHC Munchen in the DEL after mostly bouncing around the AHL for the majority of his career. You may remember him as an 18 game player with the Calgary Flames some 7-8 years ago, but now he’s got a fresh shot overseas, and he’s not bad, thus far accumulating 18 points in 19 games. Too good for the Spengler? Buddy, probably.
Mark Cundari - You know what, Cundari only played 8 games for the Flames, he’s mostly just notable for being the guy that was traded for Jay Bouwmeester. I do not want to talk about him.
I had wanted to do a riff in this spot where I package Kenny Agostino and Ben Hanowski together and lament how they were the trade return for Jarome Iginla, but to my surprise, they are both American. Would have been a good joke. Guess we’ll never know.
Corban Knight - Knight was one of those guys we thought might have been something in Calgary, a potential mainstay third line center, which back in 2013 was something that mattered to Flames fans, because we didn’t have much else. Obviously if we’re including him here, it did not work out, and these days Knight finds himself an important part of the offense for Avangard Omsk in the KHL, where he is currently their leading scorer. I thought the joke about having no players in the “should be on the team” category was funny, and it is, but in reality, I would expect to see Knight on Team Canada this time around.
Josh Jooris - Goddamn I love me some JoJoo. Jooris is a Flames fan favourite, and I will not allow you to fact check that, you’re just going to have to trust me here. He played for Team Canada at the last Spengler Cup, and quite frankly should get the nod again this year, unless of course the Calgary Flames sign him to a contract ahead of time. It could happen!
John Ramage - Ramage really has no shot here, but he plays for a team in the DEL called The Schwenninger Wild Wings, and I think that’s worth mentioning. Everything else…ehhhh..
Emile Poirier - “Emile Poirier is going to be a fixture for the Calgary Flames in a few short years” That was a thing fans actually believed. Nowadays, the guy that the team got with the Bouwmeester trade draft pick plays for Dinamo Riga in the KHL, and good lord did that trade deadline not work out AT ALL. For his part these days, Poirier has good numbers in the KHL. For a defenseman.
Hunter Shinkaruk - Plays with Poirier in Riga right now, and puts up similar numbers. Played with Spencer Foo last year. The Flames whiffed on a lot of players. The More You Know.
Linden Vey - Vey is the most Spengler Cup player of all time, in that I was positive he’s participated in this tournament before, but he certainly never has. You’ve heard of the Mandela Effect, well this is the Spengdela Effect? Is that a thing? Sound off in the comments.
Spencer Foo -
This was the most insane thing Darren Haynes ever sent into the world, and man, that’s saying something because he has said some things. Haynes in one tweet thought something kinda racist, but clarified the thing only he was thinking about wasn’t a thing, and seemed oddly proud of it.
Spencer Foo plays on a team in China now. That would break Darren’s brain, I think. He’s doing not too bad! I think he could get the call to Davos.
Nick Shore - I think all the Shores played for Calgary. I forget which one this is. Won’t be going to the Spengler Cup. Don’t care about him.
4. Longshots
Tyler Witherspoon and Brett Sutter- These ex-Flames are still under NHL contract and are currently stashed in the AHL, which seems like a barrier to entry for the Spengler, but not so! Not only have AHL teams been represented at the tournament in the past, AHL players suiting up for Team Canada is not unprecedented either, as Zach Fucale competed in three Spenglers over four years while being under contract in the NHL and bouncing around the minors.
Are Wotherspoon and Sutter that good that Team Canada would commit to such a move?
No.
Morgan Klimchuk, Chris Breen, Danny Taylor, and Dustin Boyd - Technically all of these players still qualify because they have not officially retired, but are all free agents who don’t have a contract with a team this year. It seems very unlikely that Team Canada brass would call upon any of these guys to bolster their lineup, but it’s just not impossible. But it is though.
Would be cool to see Dustin Boyd one last time! Oh well.
So I wouldn’t expect to see a heavy contingent of Flames alumni at the Spengler Cup in the end, but that shouldn’t dissuade you from watching it. If you’re disillusioned by the frankly pretty gross way all the teenagers in the corresponding World Junior Championship are put on display, the Spengler Cup is a much more palatable alternative, and it’s ends on New Year’s Eve during the day. The hockey is pretty good too. I love it a lot. It’s so weird and perfect, it’s as if The Scorchstack were a hockey league.
Up Next Week
The Flames are finally back home and get to face the dominant Carolina Hurricanes. Remember when Elias Lindholm viking clapped on them? That was cool.
Juuso Välimäki: free him.
Nikita Zadorov: jail him.
The first annual Scorchstack annual board meeting is coming up! You are not invited.